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When I wrote about the benefits of adding logical consequences to our toolkit with our daughter, I was met with some resistance from people. Most of the resistance centered on the fact that people view logical consequences as punishment and children don’t learn from punishment. I disagree and I thought I’d share a bit more on how to implement a logical consequence, along with what it does and does not include.
The system we have adhered to as a society puts the onus of do no harm on those who are acting. If you want to act against what we know to be what infants need and are asking for, namely responsiveness, should it not be you who has to prove no harm?
I feel like sleep trainers are like a mythical monster where every time you cut off one head with science and reason, two more take their place that are even more dangerous than before. In the last few months alone, the media has highlighted this method of locking your child in a room for 12 hours a day under the guise of “helping” your child and a method of sleep training newborns by not feeding them at night.
The issue of sharing is one that many parents struggle with. Do we need to force our kids to share? Will they learn it on their own? How to handle other parents?
It seems more and more in Western society, women are trying to push for ‘guilt-free parenting’ as a response to the ever popular ‘mommy guilt’ problem. There are books, blogs, and articles on the topic
This is for those of you who have gone the cry-it-out route and now regret it. The two biggest questions I'm asked on the topic - have I done irreparable harm and can I fix it? - are discussed herein.
. Herein I’d like to talk about a piece from 2008 that looked at elective c-sections and later maternal responsiveness. Not because I want to cause a stink for those who had a c-section, but because we need to understand the effects of our modern birthing practices on those intimately involved – the mother and the infant.
Play. It used to be about kids playing with each other, but that seems to be disappearing in favour of parent-child play. This is the first of a few planned posts coming up in the near future on play and focuses on my own realizations that it's something we actually need to work no in our society.
What you’ll read herein is not meant to be a condemnation of any parent who utilizes some of these methods, but rather an examination of certain parenting characteristics that are rather new to society (evolutionarily speaking) that have been empirically associated with a heightened risk of child maltreatment.
You see, the person questioned the conclusions from the Middlemiss study which found high cortisol activity in children undergoing a sleep training program in New Zealand. This is my response.
